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Spiders and Stairs... Pussies and Bears  

Paulxx001 66M
8702 posts
12/14/2018 12:46 am

Last Read:
6/14/2020 5:58 pm

Spiders and Stairs... Pussies and Bears

It was a slightly...  less than normal Friday. I'd beaten the traffic. I called Lorraine into my office. Her strut, always twisted my head - just a bit.

"Can you get Larry, Michelle, Darren...  and Brett together... for a quick meeting? Ask them to be here at 9:00 ish ... ok?"

She smiled and strode away. I watched, as her butt quivered it's way back to her desk. The gang had soon assembled and I began...

"All right, so I.m going to look at some properties for that new, customer service area, this afternoon and I want you guys with me. I n.eed as much help, as I can get. We h.ave to make a decision, in a hurry. We'll start off at that warehouse - down by the port and...."

Darren, waved his hand up at me.

"Uh . . . I don't think I'll be much help. I umm... I have Arachnophobia, and it's pretty serious. That warehouse is sure to have plenty of spiders in there. No way... I can't step inside. No way!"

"Darren...  Are you kidding me? Are you joking?"

"No... no Paul. I... I've been getting treatment for it. But it's serious."

"OK... then, you can wait in the car. We'll be going to another place with no spiders. I've made an appointment, to see that ..." and I was interrupted by Brett, who motioned to me.

"Paul... I've gotta question... We're taking the subway - right ? I can't ride in a car."

"What? What are you talking about? Of course we are. We'll take my car. There's enough room for all of us."

"Can't do it Paul. I suffer from Amaxophobia - that's a fear of cars. I can't make it inside your car... impossible. Yeah... that, will be impossible," He looked around, at the others in the room and nodded.

"What is it with you people this morning? Are you shitting me? Alright... who else has some sort of phobia? Let's get all this bullshit out of the way. Larry ... ? Any other phobias I should know about?"

"Well... uhmm...  none really, that I want to share with everyone here. They're kind of personal," Larry lowered his head and sipped his coffee. I stared back at him and gestured for him to continue.

"Well... that building we're going to ... do the elevators work? Because if they don't work... I can't go. I ugh... I can't take the stairs. I have Bathmophobia.."

"Which is what... ? You're scared of stairs?" I looked at him.

"Yes... uhm...  actually- I am. Stairs and steep slopes scare me. It'll be impossible for me to take those stairs."

"Larry - you're bullshitting me - right ? You just took the stairs, to get to my office. How'd ya do that? What did you do - close your fucking eyes?"

He looked back at me and smiled meekly. I looked at Michelle and raised my eyebrows. "Michelle... how about you? " 

"No... no... no... I.m good. I mean, uhh, I have some things... I.m working on - but I should be fine. Uhm... That warehouse we're going to... it's not that big, black, brick building... near the train tracks - is it?"

"Yes..." I replied. "It might be... Why? Are you afraid of buildings or something ?"

"Come on Paul - THAT would be fucking stupid. No... I.m not afraid of buildings. I.m just afraid... of the color black. It's a phobia called - Melanophobia, and black... just terrifies me!  Oh...  and... I uh... also have, Lockiophobia - but that... won't bother me here, at all."

"No kidding?" Darren chimed in. "You too? Wow... and I thought my wife was the only one with Lockiophobia," Michelle smiled knowingly at Darren... and blew him... a kiss...

"All right... all right... what, the fuck, is Lockiophobia ?"

"It's a fear... of childbirth Paul, " replied Michelle, in a very soft voice. Brett put his arms around Michelle's shoulder.

Darren looked at me and spoke. "You know Paul, they estimate that there are over 355 million people world wide, who suffer from some sort of phobia. So it's really not that strange. It's a serious anxiety disorder, that most people are afraid to even admit, they have."

"Really... ? Well then... what are we going to do about these buildings, that I wanted to visit today? Am I going alone ?" I looked at the group of them and leaned back in my chair, exasperated. Then it dawned on me...

"Darren... you and your wife have four . How can she be afraid of childbirth?"

Darren looked at me... and then at the others... and started laughing. Brett, Michelle and Larry all began cracking up as well. Larry's coffee spilled over the edge of his cup, as he chuckled.

Michelle looked at me and spoke, "I was going to tell you, that I also had Androphobia and Phallophobia, but I figured you wouldn't believe me. Paul... you know what today is? It is - 'International Let's Mess With Someone Day'...  and you're the one, we picked... to mess with." 

"You guys, are seriously messed up," I looked at them.

The chortles, guffaws and giggles, continued for a while. I didn't really think, it was all that funny. But when I found out what Androphobia was - well... I had to laugh. It is the fear of men, and Michelle is the biggest slu.t in the office: that is off the record of course. And Phallophobia... well... you figure it out.

We piled into my car. It was a really... tight... squeeze. Darren is a bear of a man, but we made it. All until Larry, started yelling at Brett. "Don't touch me for fucks sake. Don't touch me... asshole. You know I have Aphenphosmphobia."


© December 2018 Paul P.
..........................
So...
What type of fears (or phobias) , do you have?

How many women out there are suffering from Phllophobia ?
Some men, might suffer from Eurotophobia, but they won't admit it here.


Aphenphosmphobia = Fear of being touched
Phallophobia = The fear of a penis
Eurotophobia = Fear of female genitalia
The treatment for most phobias is to - confront them head on and face them. The sufferer of the phobia gradually becomes desensitized to their fear.
.. .
......................... .
. .


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 12:47 am

Well . . . I have a huge fear of heights, but I compensated for that by taking up skydiving - briefly. I am still scared of heights and those times while I was up there 7,000 feet in the air were amongst the most terrifying in my life. I had a great time and was really happy when I landed on solid ground !


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 12:47 am

I guess I also have a fear of drowning in the ocean. Is there a name for that? I named it Titanica-phobia . . . Supposedly there are undiscovered phobias of all sorts out there, so that one probably exists as well. Oh and spiders . . . damn those things . . . !


Daddycanpleaseu 60M

12/14/2018 12:59 am

Sounds like my office.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:12 am

Yep... If you can relate, then you know how relaxed, fun and messed up THOSE types of offices are. They're the ones that never got the memo about sexual harassment or about politically correct behavior. But they are also the ones - where I had the most fun. Does that describe yours ?


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:18 am

    Quoting  :

Glad to be able to bring a chuckle to your Friday.
Yep . . Heights is nuts. When I went sky diving ....it took all my balls to do THAT one ! Looking over the edge of the plane, 7,000 feet down, took my stomach away...
Snakes ? Under your bed ? Omg . . . I guess I could have included snakes as well. Rattlers ? Really ? omg. . . Ever thought of disciplining your cat ? lol


bitchkitty2017 71F

12/14/2018 2:23 am

Never had a fear too much of anything , I can do heights and thets no biggie..helped build a few houses for the habitat for humanity..I do have a fear of choking on hair not of the hair itself which is called chaetophobia or trichophobia but there seems to be no actual term for fear of choking on hair lol go figure maybe subconsciously that's why I wear my hair short...


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:31 am

    Quoting  :

No fears of any kind? I would call you, next time I had a spider to eliminate... if you were closer...
That Q about those men's body parts . . . would NOT apply to you . . LOL
You would LOVE sky diving. It is such a total mind trip ! When I went, (it was back in the day), where even on your first jumps, they would let you jump alone ! Nobody in tandem with me... Nobody's dick up my back! Omg ! If you ever get a chance, it is a worthy thrill !!! Do you have places near you, where that is a possibility ?


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:36 am

    Quoting bitchkitty2017:
    Never had a fear too much of anything , I can do heights and thets no biggie..helped build a few houses for the habitat for humanity..I do have a fear of choking on hair not of the hair itself which is called chaetophobia or trichophobia but there seems to be no actual term for fear of choking on hair lol go figure maybe subconsciously that's why I wear my hair short...
Yep... I does NOT surprise me that NOTHING scares you . . .
I could have used your help a few years back , when I volunteered to help a friend put on a new roof. I hovered up around the top, passing out the nails and other random stuff to the other guys on the roof. Took me a bit off effort to get off the damn roof though !
Never even heard of your hair phobia...but - I believe it. When I was reading about phobias, as I wrote this, I learned a lot about phobias and how many crazy ones there really are out there. Who knew right ? So I guess you like your male partners shorn and bare...right ? lol


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:39 am

    Quoting  :

Yes. . . I know about cats - I used to have one. Discipline is not a word in their vocabulary... that's for sure. Hey... have a great night and a great day today . . lol ... Just about ready to head out soon... over here ! l8r


CampoGirl 57F
43434 posts
12/14/2018 3:57 am

Great writing!

I didnt have any phobias until a wreck and heart attack one day... Ive overcome my fear of driving again. Took years to work out... yuo have to dig in and face phobias! ESP. if you have a phobia of peni! hahaha

Time to open up when I see one.

Now on my Blog: 👄 New Pictures 👓


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 4:10 am

    Quoting CampoGirl:
    Great writing!

    I didnt have any phobias until a wreck and heart attack one day... Ive overcome my fear of driving again. Took years to work out... yuo have to dig in and face phobias! ESP. if you have a phobia of peni! hahaha

    Time to open up when I see one.
Thanks... and for popping in and saying hello.
Wreck and heart attack ? Eeeee .... Yeah, that sounds pretty serious. That fear of driving, must have been difficult to overcome... it's a good thing you don't live in this city - you'd never drive again with all the nuts on the road here.
Yeah that penis phobia . . . Can you imagine having a phobia like that ? I see you overcoming THAT one !


pocogato12 71F  
37235 posts
12/14/2018 4:44 am

Bugs fuckin' bugs ants, spiders. Picture the morning I treated the neighbors to St Vitus dance off the back porch when I opened the door and got wrapped in spider web. Or how about those huge yellow and black ones that come to your garden in the tomatoes.
I probably could sky dive as I love hot air ballooning and have gone several times. And I can smell a liar five feet away-that' my real phobia

(Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 4:58 am

    Quoting pocogato12:
    Bugs fuckin' bugs ants, spiders. Picture the morning I treated the neighbors to St Vitus dance off the back porch when I opened the door and got wrapped in spider web. Or how about those huge yellow and black ones that come to your garden in the tomatoes.
    I probably could sky dive as I love hot air ballooning and have gone several times. And I can smell a liar five feet away-that' my real phobia
True... about those bugs . . Anything that crawls - really fast - creeps me out... to the point where I might scream like a kid !!! Picture cockroaches . . oh crap!
Well sure - hot air ballooning is similar, except for that basket you're in... Ballooning is fun! There is a festival here (in the summer) where hundreds take off every evening . . quite a sight... How high did you get ? Did the guy tell you ? Yep . . I like ballooning... I was still scared, but somehow - I felt safer in that wicker basket . . . than hanging out of a plane ...


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 5:13 am

    Quoting pocogato12:
    Bugs fuckin' bugs ants, spiders. Picture the morning I treated the neighbors to St Vitus dance off the back porch when I opened the door and got wrapped in spider web. Or how about those huge yellow and black ones that come to your garden in the tomatoes.
    I probably could sky dive as I love hot air ballooning and have gone several times. And I can smell a liar five feet away-that' my real phobia
.... Just to clarify . . Because I don't want to be called a liar ( please stop scaring me..)...
I said there were hundreds of balloons that would take off nightly at that festival... What I MEANT to say was - that there were a hundred or more, that would take off nightly.
What makes your 'liar' sense of smell so effective ? And at five feet ? Do liars smell different from the rest of us ? So if I stood 6 feet away - I'd be ok . .? Thanks for the heads up !


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 posts
12/14/2018 5:33 am

My Acrophobia reached new heights when I tried climbing the grated spiral steps of a lighthouse. I thought I'd be fine with the stairs being inside until I looked down to place my foot.......looked down, down, down ....I could see through the steps to the bottom. I froze on the first landing and couldn't take another step up.

I hope to push past this cuz I really want to get to the top of a lighthouse!
Fortunately, they are all closed for the season and I don't have to be brave 'til spring.

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 5:41 am

    Quoting superbjversion2:
    My Acrophobia reached new heights when I tried climbing the grated spiral steps of a lighthouse. I thought I'd be fine with the stairs being inside until I looked down to place my foot.......looked down, down, down ....I could see through the steps to the bottom. I froze on the first landing and couldn't take another step up.

    I hope to push past this cuz I really want to get to the top of a lighthouse!
    Fortunately, they are all closed for the season and I don't have to be brave 'til spring.
Hmmm... Yours sounds like true Acrophobia - wow ! First landing ? Baby steps . . little itty bitty baby steps . . . can you do ladders ?
Mine is just a fear of heights. I've never really frozen... hmmm Well . . except briefly at the door of that stupid plane...
Well ... It's a good thing you don't have one of those 'life threatening' phobias, like Phallophobia... !


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 6:05 am

    Quoting  :

Yes... well I am a legs man myself , and those are very nice indeed.
Aren't you supposed to be asleep ??? You're funny . . . It's 6 in the morning -= your time !!! You need a minimum of 6 hours sleep according to someone. lol Have a great day !


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 posts
12/14/2018 6:23 am

"It's a good thing you don't have one of those 'life threatening' phobias, like Phallophobia... !"

If I had phallophobia, I'd never survive this site! Think of me as a phallophile.

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


mc_justmc 63M

12/14/2018 7:07 am

I have no fear of heights, just a fear of falling, but I've always managed to deal with it. Phallophobia? Is that a real thing/word? My spell check says "no".


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 7:33 am

    Quoting superbjversion2:
    "It's a good thing you don't have one of those 'life threatening' phobias, like Phallophobia... !"

    If I had phallophobia, I'd never survive this site! Think of me as a phallophile.
You might...
If you played for the other team.. 🏃😱👰💋


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 7:57 am

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    I have no fear of heights, just a fear of falling, but I've always managed to deal with it. Phallophobia? Is that a real thing/word? My spell check says "no".
Yep... That seems to be the biggest problem with heights... It's the hardness of the ground when it comes up to you. 🤔
Well... I checked it twice and it's there on Wikipedia
Phallophobia in its narrower sense is a fear of the erect penis[1][2][3] and in a broader sense an excessive aversion to masculinity.[4]...
I think it should be obvious to you, by now, that your spell check program was written by a woman in denial, but deffinitely suffering from Phallophobia... 😨💪
I did check though... Lol 😊


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 8:01 am

    Quoting  :

That IS weird. I don't know how that works... R u afraid of anything else? 🐴 Horses, 🐮 cows... 🍰 Strawberry cheese cake? Lol... I guess you're lucky! 🍓🧀😁


11234aspinner 77M

12/14/2018 8:42 am

Sounds like some of my "friends."


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 2:46 pm

That's pretty much what it's like when you work in a small office where everyone is relaxed and just having fun... 😊😱 Thanks for dropping by...


2trythis 60F
5109 posts
12/14/2018 4:20 pm

What is the difference between phobia and fear? I consider myself as having some extreme fears: snakes, being stranded on the side of the road, and dentists. I freak out over some reptilian critters if they're too close to me, especially if they are moving. Enjoyed the story.

Oh, and no fear of penis's, especially pretty ones.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 5:43 pm

    Quoting 2trythis:
    What is the difference between phobia and fear? I consider myself as having some extreme fears: snakes, being stranded on the side of the road, and dentists. I freak out over some reptilian critters if they're too close to me, especially if they are moving. Enjoyed the story.

    Oh, and no fear of penis's, especially pretty ones.
Well... A phobia paralizes you with fear. You're frozen and you can't function. I'm afraid of heights and spiders but I'm not frozen from fear... Lol 😱😁 You know what I mean? Someone with a phobia can't get on a ladder or climb to the top of a building...
Yeah... Lizards are fast! 😱🐍🐉
Penises are pretty? Hmmm... I'm biased, of course, but except for mine and a few others... Are there any pretty ones out there? 😁😍 Omg... I guess they all have their own personality... but pretty? Lol 😎🎅


pollly_anna 60F  
697 posts
12/14/2018 6:02 pm

Fear of the dark..........yes I sleep with a night light.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 6:13 pm

    Quoting pollly_anna:
    Fear of the dark..........yes I sleep with a night light.
Wow... Really? Well... That's ok, if that's the only thing that freaks you out... Sounds like a light on at night is a good way to go. You must go a little crazy during power failures? Eeee 😱⚡🔦


Tmptrzz 61F  
107039 posts
12/14/2018 6:36 pm

That was pretty good Paul, thanks for the giggles tonight I so needed them. And NO I don't have any PHOBIA'S that I know of!!! I hope you have a great weekend..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 8:19 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    That was pretty good Paul, thanks for the giggles tonight I so needed them. And NO I don't have any PHOBIA'S that I know of!!! I hope you have a great weekend..
Glad to provide the chuckles . .
Good for you . . . although you didn't mention any fears . . . No spider or creepy crawly moments of screaming ? lol Have a great night !


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
12/14/2018 9:38 pm

I don't have any phobias but there certainly are things that I don't like. For example, heights...I love flying in a plane but don't ask me to climb a ladder or ride a roller coaster. I don't like spiders or centipedes....if there's any in the house, I call my daughter to squish them for me.
Definitely don't have phallophobia. Shall I prove it to you?


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 10:18 pm

    Quoting sexyldy1000:
    I don't have any phobias but there certainly are things that I don't like. For example, heights...I love flying in a plane but don't ask me to climb a ladder or ride a roller coaster. I don't like spiders or centipedes....if there's any in the house, I call my daughter to squish them for me.
    Definitely don't have phallophobia. Shall I prove it to you?
Yeah . . fears are more likely than phobias, for sure. Bugs seems to be a popular one, and one that I can agree with.
I don't know how you would be able to prove it to me... unless you lived near by . . Oh well .. Thanks for popping by . .. Have a great . . . well by now it is Saturday - so have a great Saturday !


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
12/14/2018 10:21 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    Yeah . . fears are more likely than phobias, for sure. Bugs seems to be a popular one, and one that I can agree with.
    I don't know how you would be able to prove it to me... unless you lived near by . . Oh well .. Thanks for popping by . .. Have a great . . . well by now it is Saturday - so have a great Saturday !
Next best thing to being there is pictures and videos
Enjoy your weekend.


pollly_anna 60F  
697 posts
12/14/2018 10:27 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    Wow... Really? Well... That's ok, if that's the only thing that freaks you out... Sounds like a light on at night is a good way to go. You must go a little crazy during power failures? Eeee 😱⚡🔦
Since I am afraid of the dark........it's a given that I have candles everywhere in the house matches&lighters.......flashlights...


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 11:05 pm

    Quoting pollly_anna:
    Since I am afraid of the dark........it's a given that I have candles everywhere in the house matches&lighters.......flashlights...
Ahhh , , , That makes a lot of sense... Good thinking... I just have one place for all of my candles and flashlights.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/14/2018 11:08 pm

    Quoting sexyldy1000:
    Next best thing to being there is pictures and videos
    Enjoy your weekend.
Pics and videos are always an alternative . . Just not the same as being there. But you know what I mean. Have a great weekend.


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
12/15/2018 10:26 am

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    Pics and videos are always an alternative . . Just not the same as being there. But you know what I mean. Have a great weekend.
You are right, but they are the gifts that keep on giving 😉


SeaGirlFL 60F
9220 posts
12/20/2018 10:30 pm

I am claustrophobic and have a fear of heights.

Hate spiders too.

"Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax." – Mark Black


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/21/2018 1:35 am

    Quoting SeaGirlFL:
    I am claustrophobic and have a fear of heights.

    Hate spiders too.
Heights . . . Imagine me sky diving out of a plane. I thought it might help if I confronted my fear . . lol
As I listen to everyone else's fears - it's starting to dawn on me that I share those same fears. Eeee I get nightmares about being a miner and stuck under ground or stuck underground in some sort of cave in...
Hmmm well . . spiders I think I can handle - except for those HUGE ones living in the desert... You know... those huge mothers ? Eeeeeee
Someone tell me a joke !!!


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
12/27/2018 8:27 am

Christmas night I spotted a spider 🕷 on my bedside table which freaked me out. When my bed squeaked, it took off to parts unknown. I kept worrying it was going to come back so couldn’t sleep. Finally got up and slept downstairs. I still don’t know where that little devil went. Ugh.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
12/27/2018 8:42 am

    Quoting sexyldy1000:
    Christmas night I spotted a spider 🕷 on my bedside table which freaked me out. When my bed squeaked, it took off to parts unknown. I kept worrying it was going to come back so couldn’t sleep. Finally got up and slept downstairs. I still don’t know where that little devil went. Ugh.
You know...? That... would have annoyed me towards no end! I probably would have flipped the bed upside down, until I had found the little bastard! 🐙 I imagine sleeping downstairs was an alternative for you. Did you ever find the guy, 🐷🐅🦁🐈🐺🐱🦃🐍🐢🐲🐙🦀


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
12/29/2018 8:44 am

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    You know...? That... would have annoyed me towards no end! I probably would have flipped the bed upside down, until I had found the little bastard! 🐙 I imagine sleeping downstairs was an alternative for you. Did you ever find the guy, 🐷🐅🦁🐈🐺🐱🦃🐍🐢🐲🐙🦀
I might have done the same thing if I wasn’t also so damn sick and just didn’t have the energy. I retreated to my cozy, big recliner.
Nope, still haven’t seen the little devil 👿. But, one of his cousins was on the kitchen window ledge. Don’t spiders 🕷 hibernate in winter?


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
5/8/2019 4:01 pm

    Quoting sexyldy1000:
    I might have done the same thing if I wasn’t also so damn sick and just didn’t have the energy. I retreated to my cozy, big recliner.
    Nope, still haven’t seen the little devil 👿. But, one of his cousins was on the kitchen window ledge. Don’t spiders 🕷 hibernate in winter?
Spiders? I thought they did.


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